I know I usually save the verses and video for Sunday posting, but I feel the need to blog today instead.
Stress levels are running high, within my household and for other people I care about as well. I'm stressing over finals and school. My hubby is stressing over finances. One of my sisters is having so many problems right now she feels like she's in a shaped like a V, with sides so steep and slick she has no way out. I'm sure my other family members are worried/stressed about things that they haven't told anyone about yet. My kiddies are dealing with end-of-year tests (state standardized and other), so they're stressed whether they understand what they are feeling or not.
Worries, no matter how major or minor, have a tendency to pile up until they overwhelm. You feel like you're in a tunnel so long that you cannot see the light at the end. I get it because I feel like this quite often. I'm learning, though. Since I started going back to church and reading the bible, I'm learning the meaning behind the saying "Let go, and let God." You have to do what you are able, then when you reach the end of your abilities you have to let it go. As hard as that is to do. I guess the real lesson is to realize your limits. My feeling is when it feels impossible, it's time to ask God for help. He's there and waiting, you just have to say the word.
I'm still struggling with this...I have a bit of Superwoman syndrome. I believe I can do it all, all at once. When the reality hits me that I can't, it hurts. I'm learning I can do it all...with help, a little at a time. I have to have faith that God is there when it gets to be too much. I hope everyone else I care for realizes that as well.
It looks like I'll be taking this summer off from my classes, unfortunately.
I went by the financial aid office after my classes today to see if I could get aid for Summer semester. I need to take my O.Chem lab and I may have to retake O. Chem as my grade isn't going to be what I would like.
Well the answer is a no, I have already used up what I can for 2011-2012 and so I'm stuck. I don't have cash on hand to pay for Summer classes (unless I happen to find 1500.00 in my couch cushions). I was looking at my fall classes to see if this will hurt me and it doesn't look like it will be too awfully bad. I'll put Bioorganic till Spring 2013 if need be and it may push a couple classes I was planning on taking that semester back, but since I wasn't planning on graduating till December 2013 now anyway...I guess that will be all right.
Anyway this gives me 3 months to work and save money and then I can make up some lost time next summer. I hope.
and studying for tests, finals and end-of-semester papers, and having company...I've been busy. So my blogging has slowed down to that end of the semester slump. Sorry no pics of the studying...unless you want to see my Microbiology and O. Chem textbooks.
Oh and got wonderful news in an email today. It appears, with the new rules regarding financial aid, I'm no longer eligible to receive a Pell grant. Now I didn't get a big grant, but it came in handy when you have a family, one income and are trying to finish up an undergrad. So here's to hoping I get a phone call about that job I interviewed for last month. The guy mentioned he was interested in hiring me in May. So some advise for current/future college students...if someone mentions getting an associates degree then bachelor's...say no thank you. They now only give you a Pell grant for six years (and the kicker) or an equivalent of 6 years before cutting you off. Apparently I've been going for an equivalent of 6 years now...my guess is my Associates degree (that I didn't use, so total waste of time and money) is what has screwed me. I thought I was doing something good at the time...
Okay well, night night dear readers. I'm off to bed then up to study for Microbiology lab final tomorrow first thing in the morning. I dread and look forward to finals. I'm so glad to be done with the semester, but so worried that I haven't studied enough throughout the semester to do well. I know I'm completely normal in that though.
I so wanted to go to church today. However I have not felt right the past few days (no energy) then yesterday was the worse. I woke up with no energy and it went down from there. I went to my son's baseball scrimmage game with him. He asked why I didn't cheer. I did, just not as much as usual. I get home and all I wanted to do is sleep. So I ate some lunch and curled up in Hubby's super big recliner and try to nap while he took the boys fishing. Well my dear daughter was still home and even with only one child home, I cannot completely rest while she's up. So I'm dosing off and on and watching Mary Poppins and she's coming over and asking questions, talking etc. Hubby gets home and I fix dinner. I think I'm feeling some better. So he asks if I want to run to Walmart with him to get some Easter stuff. I agree and while we're there, I'm all right for the first 30 minutes. Then while we are in the checkout line I start to feel off. I leave hubby in the checkout line and walk over to the bathroom for a minute. I'm feeling slightly nauseous and wanted to make sure I wasn't going to vomit in the middle of the store. The feeling eases so I go back and Hubby has moved up a little but still not checking out yet. After we get checked out we start to leave and the feeling comes back with a vengeance. Hubby asked if I needed to go into the restroom again at first I'm like I'll make. I take a step and think, I better. I'm feeling like I'm either going to puke or faint ( I get the same feeling with both) so I rush in there. I emerge pale, sweaty but still haven't puked.
So on the way home Hubby says maybe you should stay home tomorrow and rest instead of going to church. I hate it but I agree. So here I am blogging and about to do some homework, but still grateful for Jesus and his sacrifice.
and for today's verse Matthew 28:1-10:
28 Now after the Sabbath, as the first day of the week began to dawn, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary came to see the tomb. 2 And behold, there was a great earthquake; for an angel of the Lord descended from heaven, and came and rolled back the stone from the door,[a] and sat on it. 3 His countenance was like lightning, and his clothing as white as snow. 4 And the guards shook for fear of him, and became like deadmen.
5 But the angel answered and said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you seek Jesus who was crucified. 6 He is not here; for He is risen, as He said. Come, see the place where the Lord lay. 7 And go quickly and tell His disciples that He is risen from the dead, and indeed He is going before you into Galilee; there you will see Him. Behold, I have told you.”
8 So they went out quickly from the tomb with fear and great joy, and ran to bring His disciples word.
9 And as they went to tell His disciples,[b] behold, Jesus met them, saying, “Rejoice!” So they came and held Him by the feet and worshiped Him. 10 Then Jesus said to them, “Do not be afraid. Go and tell My brethren to go to Galilee, and there they will see Me.”
Approximately 1,979 years ago Jesus gave the ultimate sacrifice so that we may be saved. His love is so great, he endured so much pain and suffering, for us.
45 Now from the sixth hour until the ninth hour there was darkness over all the land. 46 And about the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?” that is, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?”[t]
47 Some of those who stood there, when they heard that, said, “This Man is calling for Elijah!” 48 Immediately one of them ran and took a sponge, filled it with sour wine and put it on a reed, and offered it to Him to drink.
49 The rest said, “Let Him alone; let us see if Elijah will come to save Him.”
50 And Jesus cried out again with a loud voice, and yielded up His spirit.
51 Then, behold, the veil of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom; and the earth quaked, and the rocks were split, 52 and the graves were opened; and many bodies of the saints who had fallen asleep were raised; 53 and coming out of the graves after His resurrection, they went into the holy city and appeared to many.
54 So when the centurion and those with him, who were guarding Jesus, saw the earthquake and the things that had happened, they feared greatly, saying, “Truly this was the Son of God!”
55 And many women who followed Jesus from Galilee, ministering to Him, were there looking on from afar,56 among whom were Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James and Joses,[u] and the mother of Zebedee’s sons.